Sunday, 2 March 2014

Bid for Bedlam Bespoke to Benefit the "I Can" children's communication charity

On Friday the bidding opened for a clutch of cool stuff, the proceeds from which will go to benefit the children's communication charity, "I CAN". You can watch Arsenal play (COYG!); hang out with Sir Paul McCartney and / or Rod Stewart; hang a water colour by HRH Prince Charles on your wall; hang one of our bespoke suits in your closet; there's a plethora of temptation and it's all going to Make A Difference so please do throw yourself into this. We must thank Huddersfield Fine Worsted for donating the fabric for the suit, which can be for a lady or gentleman and in either a country tweed or City cloth. You've got until Sunday March 16th before the auction ends.
Get drunk and put your hand in the air, come on:

If you want to leap straight to the suit, it's here:
This organisation has just celebrated, surprisingly - well, I was surprised - its 125th anniversary and as part of that they are running the Million Lost Voices Appeal of which Dame Judi Dench is patron. Her Majesty The Queen is Patron of the charity as a whole. In the last two years they have raised over £2million to support children aged 3-11 years with communication difficulties across the UK. I CAN also runs two Schools for children with severe speech, language and communication needs.

Pupils from one of these, the Meath School, performed with the London Chamber Orchestra last month at St. James' Palace and we were privileged to be there. Trying to convey how moving it was I find myself at a loss to do it justice. The children made the point perfectly, demonstrating as they sang the problems they overcome and the progress they can make with the specialist attention.

I'll stick with my sartorial small talk and tell you that Mr Wesley looked lethally slick in his black tie. We made a skirt from the Ginger Chutney tartan for me and a gold "King and I" top with the Bedlam biker zips in the sleeves (more of that later - it managed to present me in some sort of decorum on this night but led me into shame a few days later).

We brushed ourselves up and dusted ourselves down

Mr Wesley looking deadly next to the calico for one of our new jacket styles
Giving it some Angelina-style leg

At the reception afterwards HRH the Duchess of Cornwall and Ma Butler chatted animatedly. I told her we have a friend in common, Antony Price and she was keen to hear how his chickens are doing

There was a nice nod by Jerry Hall to Antony this week actually, and how her daughter Georgia May is now a paying client:

HRH The Duchess of Cornwall and Ma Butler with him and me lurking
So we are delighted to be able to help in some way and hope that you may find something in the selection that tickles your fancy and gets your bidding paddle aloft. To register, text "ICAN" to 88850.
When we were making enquiries for help in this area, I CAN was by far the most accessible and helpful resource.

From dignity to debauchery is only a few days slide, and sure enough I wore the same outfit for the Chinese Burns party held on Burns Night at our friend James' club, a tea-house opium den jazz club in London Bridge

The ebullient band leader asked who was wearing tartan and I made the mistake of showing off (don't do it kids) and stood up. Having drawn attention to myself, he then came to lead me on to the dance floor, something that brings on in your correspondent a rigor mortis of terror. He proceeded to twirl me about, raising my arms aloft. You may remember I described the gold top as Siamese in style, cut under the bust. The action of twirling about like Lorna bleedin' Doone caused it to rise up thus exposing my embonpoint to the amusement of whoever copped an eyeful. Our friend Bill, it behoves me to mention, had arrived in mufti (it is a dressy affair) so we leant him the red velvet smoking jacket and fez that we just happened to have in the trunk of the car. He only won "Best Dressed Gentleman". Honest to Goodness, you make an effort and humiliation is the reward; rock up n'importe quoi and waltz off with glory. To celebrate this accolade, we took a little turn on the floor once more, but with my arms firmly by my side that time. Some grainy footage of this exists, which I share with you below. Oddly, this had disappeared from the computer when uploading and then, equally mysteriously, has now reappeared, but such are the potent powers at Bill's disposal.